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Good Grief

It's like I've been branded for life. Whenever someone introduces me to another person with "you have so much in common" it turns out we don't. Or, well, that we have one thing in common: we were widowed at some point. In two weeks, it will have been 11 years for me, so I don't know why this looms so large in my curriculum vitae.

I have come to suspect that it has more to do with people not wanting someone else's grief to get all over their funky good time, so they want to fob them off on someone else. That they would choose someone also possibly grieving seems the height of insensitivity. This practice started less than 3 months after ajrose93 passed with the most recent occurrence this week. Not that I ever unloaded my sorrows on anyone else though I may mention in passing when advising someone going through a difficult time. But I certainly never bring such things up in polite company. Yet here it is, my scarlet letter, forever expected to console others on behalf of people who have better things to do. I would not begrudge anyone. Compassion is, after all, the vice of kings. I would just rather not be volunteered. The grief stricken are apparently a burden on society who must gather like lepers in our own colony, a place of indefinite detention with no recourse or appeal. I'm ready to be released with time served.

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